It's now May 3rd 2017 and today I feel fat! It's time to do something about it. I have never been this fat in my life! When I started to get sick so many years ago, the first treatment that the neurologists gave me were steroids. And the doses were humungous! I would have 3000mg to 5000 mg, every 3 months or so. That combined with the fact that my body wasn't able to exercise like it used to, started the journey of weight gain. Add to that the fact that I've been in a wheelchair and paraplegic since 2010, weight gain is a given.
I was thinking about weight and my relationship with food this morning, and thinking back to my childhood. As long as I can remember I have always been very conscious of my weight, appearance and I always thought I wasn't very pretty. I'm not sure where that came from, perhaps advertisements in magazines, or an insecurity which could be a part of growing up, I'm not sure.
I've never been skinny so I don't expect to be thin, however where I'm at is ridiculous! These are some of the reasons my weight has ballooned, and reasons for having to lose weight.
REASONS FOR WEIGHT GAIN
- Menopause - I went through menopause when I was in my late 30's due to 6 months of chemotherapy. I had the chemo as I was so ill and it's used in extreme cases. It worked for 2 years.
- Inability to exercise effectively and burn fat.
- Fatigue. Fatigue is a big part of the disease. I find the older I get, the more fatigue I have. This makes it very difficult to cook meals, OR DOES IT?
- Laziness. I was thinking about this, this morning. Have I become a little lazy, or am I fatigued? Does the additional weight make it harder to move, and do I have less energy because of that?
- Depression. I look in the mirror every morning before and after my shower, and I'm disgusted. I can not believe the rolls of fat and where they are! With that comes BAD SELF TALK. Things like "you idiot", "you're fat and disgusting", and so much more. That's not healthy at all, and not a good way to start the day.
- Companies that deliver food. I've discovered Deliveroo, Ubereats etc, and it's very easy to be eating the wrong food, and quantities within 15 minutes. This is often a result of depression, fatigue and laziness.
- Bad patterns and habits that I've developed.
WHY I HAVE TO LOSE IT
There are many reasons for having to lose the weight.
- HEALTH REASONS. To avoid diseases like diabetes, heart problems, cholesterol (if possible), make it easier on my bones now I have Osteoporosis, and more.
- SELF ESTEEM.
- EASIER TO MOVE. ie transferring.
- PREVENT INJURIES. My body doesn't work properly because of the lesions on my spinal cord, therefore I really need to protect my arm, shoulders, wrists etc when using all those elements.
- FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE, within myself and my equipment.
- EQUIPMENT - be within equipment weight requirements.
I have seen psychologists, signed up for Weight Watchers and the new CSIRO diet online. I've read books, diets galore, and done just about everything. I've decided that is just a waste of time, for me that is.
I know that what works for me is what I eat and drink, and quantities. Some of the drugs also make me extraordinarily hungry. I also have to be careful because being paraplegic, there are foods I can't eat, times I need to eat by, in order for my bowels to work properly. I don't have any allergies.
I'm not good at keeping a food diary, as in writing everything down every day. However over the years I've done so much reading and documenting, that I now have a rough idea what to and not eat.
- PORTION CONTROL
- WHAT I EAT.
- BLOG IT.
I'm not good at discipline however it's time to implement some. I have deleted the food delivery apps off my phone and PC.
Go back to making my salad for lunch once a week, and dividing it into plastic containers. This means it'll take me 2 minutes to take one out of the fridge, add tuna and off I go.
Portion my chicken etc for night time, and grill more often. I've just bought a new grill which does the job beautifully, and is easy to clean.
Be ORGANISED. I'm usually very organised, however push myself a bit, and allocate a day to do it. I also usually cook once a week and freeze portions in plastic containers. I have cut up vegetables in the fridge ready to be steamed as well.
And Ive decided to blog my journey. Not for anyone else's benefit other than mine. I have been thinking about this for a long time, as I've seen how successful other people have been in doing so. When I first thought about it, it worried me as I thought I'd really have to honest as I'm putting it "out there". I also thought that It'd be a great way to record my progress, as well as keep me discipled and honest. Hopefully.
PLEASE FEEL FREE TO HELP ME, IF YOU CAN -
Not to say things like "you look as though you've lost weight, etc, but to say "I'M COMING OCVER TO WORK OUT WITH YOU", or help me out with meal preparation etc, if at all possible. Or please feel free to make suggestions. I don't mind the compliments, however to just encourage me and help me out. Please don't judge me as I will have to be honest with myself, and in doing so will be sharing secrets that I have not told many people. I'm in, and will be in a very vulnerable place. I know some days will be so much harder than others, but hey, I'm most certainly not the first person to ever go on a weight loss journey!
I do have scales that I had made that I drive onto with the wheelchair. The maximum weight that it takes in 300 kgs. Last time I weighed my wheelchair it weighed 170 kg, and that was 17/11/2015. Since then I have had various adjustments made so will need to weight it again. I shall do that tomorrow, 04/05/17.
IT'S TIME TO START!